Remember the Poignant scene from the cult classic Dil Chahta Hai, where the three friends are sitting on a broken wall of a fort, staring into the horizon and Akash says, we should come to Goa atleast twice year. And Sid replies, well forget coming even once, we all meeting each other once in ten years is going to be difficult.
I had jeered and laughed at that scene. How can we all friends who have spent more time with each other than our families during college days, who have shared our deep dark secrets, who have laughed and cried together, not meet once a year ( and he is talking about ten years). Now its 6 years since I first watched the movie….and whenever I watch that scene now, I don’t laugh or jeer at it anymore.
I own a 2bhk flat, come to office on a great bike, wearing a Tommy Hilfiger jacket, Nike Shoes, an expensive watch, a cool mp3 player, own a Sony laptop....I have all the material comforts that one needs and maybe more….I enjoy good respect and recognition in my office…and add a beautiful girlfriend to the picture …my life just seems perfect. But no, its not. It maybe perfect to look at, but somewhere deep down, a thought which started evolving couple of years back and has now become a disease causing germ. I am not satisfied nor content nor happy. Whenever people ask me, what is my future, I get irritated and frustrated, cos I don’t have an answer. I get irritated and frustrated when the policeman down the street stops a bike and demands bribe, when I don’t get a hike that I anticipated (how much hike will satisfy me, well I don’t know), when politicians take a minor issue and make a national issue out of it. I don’t know what to do. I sit and argue on the reservation issue.
It’s almost four years since I passed out of my college. For the first few weeks, me and my friends used to meet regularly and made it a point that we met every week, attend all the college alumni functions, attend all weddings (even if it was a friend’s sister wedding). But now after years, well I don’t remember when the last time our gang was together. Last week, two lovebirds from my engineering class got married. And there were only two people from my class who attended it. I was not one of them. It hurts me. It hurts my friends also. But nobody is doing anything to change it. Why have the things changed? Why is that from the energetic youth, we have become lazy, self content, mind you not satisfied. Our mind and heart yearns to do things.
Soon I will get married. Higher education or marriage, MBA or MS….These questions that first came to my mind 3 years back, still remain a question today. 3 years have passed, but for me nothing has changed. I am still contemplating what to do. Maybe I will continue doing for the rest of my life and by the time I take a decision, I guess it will be too late.
For the moment, I would like to go to Goa with my friends and prove that we can still meet, when we want. I just checked with my friends, they are all busy. So I will have to wait some more time, maybe months…maybe years.....!!!!!!!!!!
Somewhere deep down, I realize what Sid said in Dil Chahta Hai might be true. And the thought’s scaring me. I have to change to it….I have to change myself…
No comments:
Post a Comment